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- #63: We are one.
#63: We are one.
Shem Opolot
March 15, 2024
Hi! Welcome to The Friday Fix! You’re reading this because you probably stumbled upon this post somewhere on the internet instead of where it should be—in your inbox. But no worries; we can fix that.
Who am I? I’m Shem Opolot, a health professional turned content creator, passionate about helping people be their best selves in life and work.
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I have over ten years of work experience in healthcare, program management, and data analytics on two continents. So, I know a little about helping you work smarter
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I’ll occasionally make you laugh
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Happy Friday 🎉 ~500 people read The Friday Fix every week, and 40% of those read it within the first two hours after I send it. That blows my mind and scares me.
Like a comedian on a stage (which I am not), I’d like to do some crowd work today, so hit reply and tell me what you love about TFF, or just tell me how you’re doing. What are you excited about right now? What are you worried about? I’ll put a kettle of tea on and reply to every email.
Thank you for your time.
CareerLab is the best way to get all the hacks I share here and become more confident and competent at work. This month’s CareerLab session is on March 30th from 9 am - 1 pm East African Time. But…there are only five slots left. The first five people to fill out this form will get a 50% discount.
LIFE.
We are one.
People are the best and worst of everything.
I went on two separate coffee dates with two friends in two weeks, and the same things came up multiple times: dating is hard, and relationships make the world go round.
But I learned a lot on those coffee dates:
People are different but the same. Depending on how you define “lived,” I’ve lived in Kampala, Florida, Nairobi, North Carolina, Ohio, New Jersey, Senegal, Switzerland, Hungary, etc. In all those places, the locals said some version of these things:
“If you don’t like the weather here, wait five minutes.”
“Dating in this town is like dating in a boarding school; everyone knows everyone, and everyone has dated everyone.”
“In this town, it’s who you know, not what you know.”
BATNA. BATNA stands for Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement, and the possibilities for splicing it into social commentary are endless. Quite frankly, I’m a little sad I’ve just discovered it.
While speaking to a black lady friend in D.C., she mentioned that the dating scene is rough for women in D.C. because there are way more ladies than eligible black bachelors. This tipped social scale makes most men in D.C. ungovernable because of the opulence of options.
Sound familiar?
A week later, at a brunch date with one such black eligible bachelor in D.C., I mentioned that lady’s concerns to him, and he agreed and introduced me to the word BATNA. He talked about the idea that a man of means in D.C. can always get a better woman—prettier, more accomplished, more ambitious, more fun—prevents the man of means from “settling down.”
The eligible bachelor and the lady friend droned on about the spokes and wheels of dating today. About the apps and thirst traps. And it all sounded like an exercise in ones and zeros managed in spreadsheets instead of, ahem, 500-thread-count sheets.
But the striking similarities in these stories gave me solace.
If Jane in Kampala is getting ghosted like Judith in D.C., and neither Paul in Miami nor Peter in Nairobi can rely on the weather app on their phone, then perhaps we’re all connected by some intangible nervous system, and value can flow from one seemingly disparate well to irrigate others.
I’m trying to be that well today.
People are the best and the worst of everything.
When you love a new job or a new city, the people make that experience magical. And when you leave a bad job or abandon your home country, it’s probably because people gave you hell.
We must learn to coexist with humanity's best and worst. We must learn to disagree with people without blocking them because curating echo chambers, where everyone agrees with us, doesn’t reflect reality.
We must get interested in people—where they are from, why they believe the things they believe, why they have such huge chips on their shoulders, why they are so defensive.
Slow down and take the time to get to know people instead of treating them as a means to an end.
This way, you plug into that central nervous system from which empathy and change spring eternal.
THINGS.
This entire snippet
This excerpt from the Irish Times regarding the British Royal Family is scorching hot.
A picture
In this week’s edition of “God, when?” Evelyn found this cute little ‘library’ while Zi and I were fighting for our lives on the playground behind it.
WORK.
3 Google Docs tips for you.
Open a new doc faster. If you’re logged into your Google Workspace account in your browser, typing “doc.new” in the address bar will open a new Google doc.
Edit faster with “@.” Typing “@” lets you insert pretty much anything into your doc. Just type what you want, and voilà!
 |  |
Default font. Do you have a favorite font, but it isn’t active by default every time you open a new Google Doc? After editing your next document, headings and all, make your desired formatting the default setting for all your future docs.
FUN.
The Friday Fix Playlist
Brain teaser
For every Christmas since Jane was born, her parents put as many coins in a jar as she was old. For example, when Jane was 1, they put 1 coin in the jar. If the jar has 21 coins now, how old is Jane?
Answer below
Shem’s picks
✔️ What makes an album the greatest of all time?
✔️ There’s a secret game in your Instagram DMs.
✔️ Another PDF tool for all your needs.
Brain teaser answer
Answer: Jane is 6 years old.
Age 1 = 1 coin
Age 2 = 2 coins
Age 3 = 3 coins
Age 4 = 4 coins
Age 5 = 5 coins
Age 6 = 6 coins
Add up the coins, and you get 21. You can watch the video source here. It’s hilarious.
Have a great weekend,
— Shem
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