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- #84: What is in a name?
#84: What is in a name?
Shem Opolot
August 16, 2024
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Who am I? I’m Shem Opolot, a health professional turned content creator, passionate about helping people be their best selves in life and work.
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Otherwise, grab a seat 🪑.
Happy Friday 🎉 Did you know percentages are “reversible?” For example, 8% of 20 is the same as 2% of 80, or… 8% of 25 is the same as 25% of 8.
Yeah…good luck untying that knot in your brain.
LIFE.
What is in a name?
Do you know what your name means?
Usually, names serve three purposes:
1) to summarize all a person’s attributes and deeds (see pet names in Rutooro),
2) to memorialize a major event or person (see most people called Mandela or Covida—yeah, for real) or
3) to aspirationally embody some desired attribute or quality (see people called Patience, Immaculate, etc.)
Shem comes from the Hebrew “Ha-shem,” meaning, wait for it, “name.”
It’s deeper than that, but this is neither the pulpit nor the newsletter.
Two of my most influential friends taught me two important life lessons. My atheist friend Yücel taught me how to love, and my friend Grace taught me the power of names and labels.
I met Grace during my master's studies, and one of my most memorable interactions with her involved a friend of ours named Alana. At the time, Alana identified as a gay woman. But a couple of months into the semester, at a party, Grace told me Alana preferred to be called Alan.
“She went by Alana; she wants to be called Alan now. Get with it. It’s not that hard. Don’t make it about you.”
So I went with it.
You see, everything has a name, whether we know it or not. Even among birds in a flock, each bird has a unique song used to identify it.
Shame on you, John Speke and Christopher Columbus.
When we call birds woodpeckers or sparrows or eagles, we label them for our convenience. Speke and Columbus did the same thing with pretty much, well, everything.
We use labels to tell specific stories about ourselves, things, or people we encounter.
So… Alana, Alan, gay, bi, lesbian, non-binary, Zionist, etc., all I see are people trying to control their story because our illusion of control keeps us alive.
However, since labels are tied to stories, stories can change, and therefore, labels can change.
From handicapped to disabled to “person with a disability.”
From fat to curvy, to plus-size to fat again(?) (Grace told me “fat” is in again— and I thought to myself: no one kept African aunties abreast of these updates).
A person with a disability swims in the Olympics and declares that their achievement proves they are abled in many ways and disabled in one sense, and therefore, being labeled “disabled” generally doesn’t fit their [new] story about themselves.
Alas, a new label is born.
But if you’re like me, all the label changes can be a little confusing sometimes.
For example, instead of using suicide, we’re saying “unalive” now?! I worry about certain label changes because we’re such fickle fellows.
If a new label is created merely as a euphemism without the right dose of empathy, it won’t stick.
For example, let’s say Shem has a big nose, and you label people like Shem knobs. Shem and his ilk hate the label, obviously, and over time, they rally their voices into a quorum that produces a new, more palatable label—generous-nosed people.
And generous-nosed people works for a while. But it still describes something people turn their noses at (I couldn’t resist). So, over time, being called generous-nosed people also becomes an insult. And the cycle continues.
Only empathy and kindness can break the cycle.
So, as you struggle to process all those platitudes and pronouns, ask yourself these three questions:
1) Have you tried to empathize?
2) Does the label change affect you negatively? (if not, get with it; it’s not that hard), and
3) Connected to #1: What new story is that person trying to tell about themselves?
Now…my question to you is: if you could give yourself a new label, what would it be?
What story do you want to tell about yourself?
THINGS.
A quote
Jack Butcher tells you why being employed is a good way to transition to being self-employed.
[W]orking in a commercial environment that forces you to build a specific skill puts you at a massive advantage[;] you start from a position of iteration vs. invention.
Source: Jack Butcher, Visualize Value
A poem.
Source: Unknown
A picture.
This issue is late because we were outside celebrating my little sister’s birthday. I regret nothing.
WORK.
A fake email for your signups.
Two things:
I like being inclusive, but I can’t find a good alternative for this app for my Windows people.
Don’t use this app against me and place The Friday Fix emails there 😅.
Ok, this app lets you create a fake email address (with a password) to sign up for things online.
FUN.
The Friday Fix Playlist
Shem’s picks
✅ The top 100 best films of the 2000s.
✅ Obama’s songs of the summer, even though no one believes the list is organically curated by him.
✅ For future reference: travel tips for visiting the world’s best places.
✅ Get help planning your trips on this forum
✅ A website with spurious correlations.
Have a great weekend,
— Shem
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