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- #37: Growing pains
#37: Growing pains
Shem Opolot
September 15, 2023
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Who am I? I’m Shem Opolot, a health professional turned content creator, passionate about helping people be their best selves in life and work.
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Happy Friday 🎉 At 5.18 p.m. (EAT) last Friday, while you were... reading this newsletter (duh), my daughter was born. As my eyes lactated and the nurse brought little Zoé around the curtain to meet her parents for the first time, there was one thing on both our minds—Whose nose does she have?
It’s pronounced ‘Zoway’, but we know everyone (including our family) is going to say Zoey, so consider this your permission to butcher her name. If her cry is any indication, she’ll fight her own battles just fine.
***
In other news, my friends want to help you do adulting better. Help them help you.
Estimated read time: 6 minutes
💡 1 thing I’ve learned
Growth is like the worst
Put up your hand if you’ve ever felt inadequate.
My eyes scan the room like laser beams in a fancy museum in a heist movie. Several hands in the audience shoot up unrestrainedly before slumping down just as fast.
Put up your hand if you feel inadequate right now.
Fewer hands shoot up, but still an overwhelming majority.
I pause for dramatic effect, open my body up, pace two steps to the right and back, and start speaking…
I’ve had classes for three weeks, and honestly, I’m fighting for my life.
1) I’m taking three classes, each requiring 5–10 hours a week of out-of-the-classroom preparation. I’ve barely met my deadlines so far, and I can feel my resolve tested like the buttons on a fat man’s shirt after lunch.
2) Zoé is here, and she, like most newborns, seems to be an aspiring askari. And Zoé’s little brother, Zion, sleeps through the night, but when he’s awake, he squeezes all the juice out of life. This makes him a level 5 threat when his eyes are open. So, basically, we’re not getting any sleep.
3) Then… D.C. is expensive, and I haven’t gotten a place to stay yet. I’ve been sleeping on a friend’s couch for a few days before hopping on a middle-of-the-night train (because the tickets are cheap at 3am) back to my family in Jersey on Wednesdays after my classes. I’m exhausted and essentially living out of a suitcase.
4) The funding for my program is delayed, so every time in class when the door at the back of the room flings open, I expect to see the bursar with a list with my name on it and a megaphone for good measure.
5) My Ugandan business affairs are hanging by a thread, desperately in need of some ka money expected to turn into cold, hard cash to be collected.
6) And while this newsletter offers respite, it’s still a competing interest, so writing it is like writing a love letter in Senior 6, the night before mocks. You know it’s true love.
As I type this, I’m feeling anxious, nervous, exhausted, and—yes—inadequate.
But I must move forward.
To move forward, I must reframe my feelings of inadequacy as growing pains.
I’ve read more in the past few weeks than I have in a long time, and my brain is expanding with ideas and interests. I’ve held Zoé’s tiny body in my hands and covered her in kisses, and to respond, she has peed and pooped on me twice. I’ve taught Zion how to drop kick a football.
If it were easy, if I didn’t doubt myself often, If it were familiar, it wouldn’t be growth.
Growth is new. And unexpected. And uncomfortable. And scary.
But face it, I must. And face it, you must.
I stop and bow to much adulation. The lights fade, and I disappear into the darkness.
🔌 Shameless plug
Here’s a fun stat: As of this moment, TLDR Weekly has been read 12,868 times. 12,869 looks good on you 😉.
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🎁 My favorite things
A quote
I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.
A picture
Cute, right? However, this picture fails to capture the collective anxiety in the room every time Zion steals a chance to interact with his new baby sister. Forever is going to be a mighty long time for these two. I’m excited for them.
🚀 Pro tip
Upload a PDF; ask it any questions.
I was supposed to read a long, boring PDF and take a 15-question quiz on it thereafter. But I didn’t have the time to read the PDF.
So, I uploaded the PDF into this tool and pasted the quiz questions into the tool to get the answers. I scored 93% on the quiz.
You didn’t get this from me.
🧩 Where fun goes to flourish
The Friday Fix playlist
Brain teaser
From Braingle.
The sentences below each contain an insect that you need to find and exterminate! Can you spot them all?
1. It's not always easy to listen to what my mother says, but most of the time, it's the right thing.
2. All of a sudden, this wee, vile creature crawled up my arm, and all I could do was shriek!
3. Long term itemizing of your priorities in life always helps.
Answer below
Shem’s picks
🗺 A map showing countries with the most paid vacation days
📝 The right-now list: another productivity hack you can try
Brain teaser answer
Answer:
1. It's not always easy to listen to what my MOTHer says, but most of the time, it's the right thing. - MOTH
2. All of a sudden, this WEE, VILe creature crawled up my arm and all I could do was shriek! - WEEVIL
3. Long TERM ITEmizing of your priorities in life always helps. - TERMITE
Have a great weekend,
— Shem
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