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- #33: Feedback is fickle
#33: Feedback is fickle
Shem Opolot
August 18, 2023
Hi! Welcome to The Friday Fix! You’re reading this because you probably stumbled upon this post somewhere on the internet instead of where it should be—in your inbox. But no worries; we can fix that.
Who am I? I’m Shem Opolot, a health professional turned content creator, passionate about helping people be their best selves in life and work.
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I’ll occasionally make you laugh
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Happy Friday 🎉 I typed this while cordoned off in the aisle seat of a plane with my knees sniffing my chest and my neck wobbly from failing to find a comfy spot for the 15-hour flight ahead.
The experience made the unofficial rules of plane etiquette clear to me, so here are the cliff notes:
If the flight is an hour or less, don’t recline your seat back
The person at the window seat manages all window affairs, including the right to turn the window into a pillow
The person in the aisle seat (my personal favorite) can roam freely and dangle their leg in the aisle (when the stewards and trolleys are absent)
The middle seat is purgatory, with no promise of salvation after a thousand prayers. The only perk? Full control of the middle armrests
Ignore this if you perpetually fly business class and above, of course.
Estimated read time: 6 minutes
💡 1 thing I've learned
Feedback is fickle
Soure: GIPHY
What started out as a fantastic date turned into one of the most humiliating days of my life.
I’ve always maintained that when it comes to my attraction to women, I don’t have a type. But when forced to pick, I say I love a good face.
But one humid Florida day in college, I met Tricia, and suddenly I had a type.
And that type was whatever Tricia was: 5’2, fine, too; and crowned with curly natural black hair purchased by her racial ambiguity; an even row of pearl-white teeth that shined through every time she curved her lips into a smile, and a body shaped like an Instagram model before Instagram models were a thing.
But it got better.
Tricia was funny and a math major. For the nerd in me, the only thing better than vibing with a statistical anomaly was vibing with a statistical anomaly who knew what a statistical anomaly was.
Tricia’s presentation inspired unprecedented pluck in me, so I moved earth, wind, and fire to speak to her.
And we spoke. And we laughed. And we hung out together in my room one night.
And she told me she couldn’t imagine kissing me. Ever.
While Tricia’s rejection hurt me, it taught me a useful lesson about feedback: mortifying though it might be, feedback is often only pertinent to the moment in time it’s given.
Why?
Because a couple of years and pushups later, Tricia had a change of heart.
***
When was the last time you told someone they had bad breath? And why are we terrified of giving people such negative feedback?
Frankly, if I smell bad, tell me. In fact, let’s all agree on a signal now. It’ll be a Friday Fix secret. You’ll take two fingers of your right hand—your index finger and middle finger—and double tap the tip of your nose to indicate bad breath. The same two fingers double-tapped on the ball of the left shoulder will signify bad body odor. There. Like vaccine herd immunity, eventually everyone will be subscribed to the Friday Fix, and we’ll all know when we smell bad.
Okay, back to feedback: How to give it; how to take it.
Feedback is usually time-sensitive. A bad work evaluation is tied to a period of time and offers you the opportunity to change in the future. Feedback rarely describes the birthmarks of your character.
How to take it: Remember, feedback is for a moment in time, not forever. And you can fix it, so take it with grace, and I dare say, gratitude.
How to give it: Make it quick. It’s bad enough I have to listen to you tell me my mouth stinks; don’t make me listen to this feedback for 20 minutes.
It’s awkward for everyone involved.
🔌 Shameless plug
The TLDR Weekly family is growing faster than that list of books you keep saying you’ll read. Don’t miss out.
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A video
These 4 questions will help you price your product
🚀 Pro tip
Add a spark to your table in 3,2,1…
Sometimes you have a regular data table and want to spice it up.
Sparklines are great for that!
1. Start with data
2. Add a Trend column that’ll show the trend in sales of each individual flower variety inside a single cell
3. In the first cell in the Trend column corresponding to the Orchid flower variety, enter the SPARKLINE function:
=SPARKLINE(data, [options])
data - the range of data to plot
[options] - details for customizing the graph. For example: SPARKLINE(A2:E2, {"charttype","bar";"max",50})
When done, copy the formula downwards using Ctrl + D on a PC or ⌘ + D on a Mac
4. You can customize the Sparkline by adding optional details to the SPARKLINE function:
=SPARKLINE(A2:E2, {"charttype","line";"color",”green”})
Please note, to customize the sparkline follow this format:
=SPARKLINE(data, {“feature1”, “detail_about_feature_1”; ”feature2”, “detail_about_feature_2”})
This is what the final product could look like:
Sparklines are one of those features that aren’t compulsory but can make your work stand out.
🧩 Where fun goes to flourish
The Friday Fix playlist
Brain teaser
From Braingle.
My first serves as positive recognition
My next's played in a friendly competition
My whole is a pay later proposition
What am I?
Answer below
Shem’s picks
🚢 Did you know cruise ships can move sideways?
🏠 A nine-step plan for the next time you have a room to decorate
🦠 Your immune system is more dangerous than you think
Brain teaser answer
Answer: credit card
Line 1 refers to the word “credit” as in when one is given credit for something good that they have done.
Line 2 refers to a card in a deck of playing cards. Thus, "a friendly competition" refers to a card game.
Line 3 refers to the concept of using a credit card in order to make a purchase now, with the ability to "pay" for it "later".
Have a great weekend,
— Shem
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