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- #71: Check on your loved ones.
#71: Check on your loved ones.
Shem Opolot
May 10, 2024
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Who am I? I’m Shem Opolot, a health professional turned content creator, passionate about helping people be their best selves in life and work.
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Happy Friday 🎉 Here’s a verbal representation of how an avocado ripens:
I AM NOT READY. I AM NOT READY. I am ready. I AM ROTTEN. EWW.
Remember Daniel? He agreed to share a personal story this week, so I’m excited to share it with you. But…trigger warning: if you or your loved one struggle with depression or suicidal ideation, you might want to skip this one.
LIFE.
Check on your loved ones.
From left to right: Foreground: Little Daniel, Daniel’s sister, Daniel’s Dad, Matt; Background: Daniel’s mom, Daniel’s elder brother.
My parents told me they knew Matt would be a challenge from the moment he was born. He could be an especially moody and fussy toddler, but weirdly, he also showed more affection than their other children did at the same age. He was a crawling contradiction.
Matt loved animals. I know it's cliche to say that, but he reeeeallly loved animals. His dog (a beagle) was Bo, and his cat (a snowshoe) was Toby. When my parents went with a teenage Matt to put Bo down, our vet pulled them aside and said, "I know what to do about the dog, but I don't know what to do about the boy." Dr. Whiteway had put hundreds of pets down in the past, but she'd never seen anything like his reaction. Matt held Toby tighter after that.
Matt was a genius. People throw the term around loosely, but the dude was brilliant. He hacked a government website as a teenager and helped build an intricate online music-sharing platform before anyone knew what Napster was. According to one of his buddies, by 1999, Matt had the largest 311 collection (including demos and unreleased tracks) of anyone on the internet. He was 16 at the time.
He also built his own extremely Y2K website and custom-made a car MP3 system a year before the first iPod was released. He was a National Merit Scholar and a high school dropout. You don't see that every day.
For his Science Fair project in 10th grade, Matt made a potato cannon and used it to deface property all over Atlanta. He also robbed trains, threw raves in forests, and once got pulled over for driving 100mph in the pouring rain on Spaghetti Junction. We all think he would've outgrown that stuff, but as it stands, it's pretty good lore for a guy who never turned 21.
As much as my parents smile when reflecting on some of his greatest hits (I forgot to mention that he was banned from eBay before he was old enough to use it), they get tripped up on the wasted potential of it all. Where would he be today? Who would he be? How would the rest of us be different? It's always the toughest part of this anniversary.
My parents think his precocious wit would be even more biting, and they're optimistic he'd have given up petty crimes and online vigilante campaigns. I'm not so sure about the latter, but I'm confident he'd stand for the right things and embrace even the toughest people to love. More than anything, that's who he was. A rebel, sure, but one with a soft soul.
Back to that photo.
Not even a week after that photo was taken, Matt's depression got the best of him. He struggled with substance abuse but, at the time, was off drugs and as clearheaded as any of us had seen him in years.
The seemingly strongest people often suffer in silence. I know we all know that, but it's easy to forget.
Go out of your way to have fun. Listen to the music you love until your ears bleed. Engage in civil disobedience.
Drive fast every now and then. Be kind always.
Check on your loved ones.
THINGS.
A quote.
If you’re lucky in life, make sure a bunch of people are lucky, too.
An excerpt.
There once lived in a sequestered part of the county of Devonshire, one Mr. Godfrey Nickleby, a worthy gentleman, who taking it into his head rather late in life that he must get married, and not being young enough or rich enough to aspire to the hand of a lady of fortune, had wedded an old flame out of mere attachment, who in her turn had taken him for the same reason: thus two people who cannot afford to play cards for money, sometimes sit down to a quiet game for love.
Now watching.
We love a good romcom in our household, and Anne Hathaway doesn’t miss. Side note: <gasp> We’ve gone from seeing Anne Hathaway in Princess Diaries to a mother in this one. My knees are creaking like an old wooden staircase just typing this.
WORK.
For your next interview…
I’ve been on a job interview grind these past few months, and it’s hard, but hey, at least there are interviews.
Here are a few questions you can ask when the opportunity arises:
Is there anything else I can elaborate on to ensure I’m the best choice?
What doubts do you have about my qualifications for this role?
What skills and experiences do you hope the ideal candidate has that we haven’t gotten a chance to discuss?
Can you describe a typical day in this role?
What key achievements would define success in the first 6-12 months?
How does this company handle internal promotions and career advancement?
What are the biggest challenges I would face in the first 3 to 6 months if hired?
What are some must-have soft skills you feel contribute most to success here?
Here’s the source if you want more context.
FUN.
The Friday Fix Playlist
Cross out two letters to see a familiar English word.
TBAWONLEATNTEARS
Hint: Things are not always as they seem. Read the question again.
Answer below
Shem’s picks
✅ Where to go in 2024.
✅ How well-read are you? Test your knowledge of famous first lines.
✅ Curious about how glass is made? You’re welcome.
Answer: When you cross out T, W, O, L, E, T, T, E, R, and S, “BANANA” remains.
Have a great weekend,
— Shem
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